The choices we make....

The other day a friend of mine said to me, "Allison, you are such a procrastinator!" It was then that it really hit me: she is right!!! Clearly I procrastinated on registering for and taking the GRE (see my last post), I have yet to write the final exam for my kiddos (and my colleague wanted a copy of it a few weeks ago...good thing he is so nice), last summer when I was in my 2nd year of graduate school but first year of graduate school online, I didn't quite get "online" on the start date, and kind of started the class a little behind (again - I have gracious professors!), and now I am sitting here with a STACK of projects to grade, and it is 8:13pm (I have been "off duty" since 1pm). As you can see........I AM A PROCRASTINATOR. Oops. I can't blame this trait on anyone but myself. Procrastination comes from choices I make.... Life is all about choices. We get to make choices every day. Sometimes they are little choices with not-so-big-of-deal consequences. Sometimes they are medium choices, and, you guessed it, sometimes there are HUGE choices to make that will affect the outcome of life. One decision we make every day, every second, is what we choose to say to OURSELVES - in our own heads. All those little thoughts we say to ourselves, about ourselves, they don't always seem like a big deal at the moment, but over time, those little "self-talks" can really start to affect a person's life. I had a good talk with a friend the other night, and one thing I walked away with was this: I need to stop allowing myself to think so negatively - about myself. Yikes. My friend pointed out (and that's not the first person, by the way) that I can have a really negative view of myself, and that leads to self-doubt, and self-pity, and all of a sudden those negative thoughts start to affect how I act. Right - so you already knew all of this, didn't you? well, you'd think as a (ahem...) 28 year old teacher born in the midwest would realize this too, and turn it around. Alas.... In chapel yesterday, our speaker (the "Worldviews" teacher at school) gave a good sermon about Spiritual Formation. The first thing he said was that the first step in our Spiritual Formation is the CHOICE to accept Christ and follow Him - every day. Did you read that? It is a choice EVERY day to follow Christ. Every day. Just because I got baptized in a river in MN when I was 12 does not mean that every choice I make is one that follows Christ and His teachings. Oh, if only it were that simple. Nope. We have to choose it every stinkin' day. Every day on the way home from school I am tempted to turn on my passenger side blinker and make my way into the Starbucks parking lot. I'm talking EVERY day I am tempted with this. I drive to and from work alone (duh), so I get kind of bored/tired, especially in the warm sunny California afternoons. Thus, the "need" for a caffinated beverage. When I choose to stop for a cup of joe - I reap the consequences of that choice. A) get jazzed on the way home and don't fall alseep at the wheel B) run into seniors at WCHS who have a free 7th period C) fewer dollars to spend on...a flight to Minnesota, new running shoes, rent, the offering on Sunday, groceries, the student at Calvin that I support, etc. D)(this is the worst) I am taking in lots and lots and lots of calories. Yeesh. See what I mean? Today when I got home from work, I had the choice to either start writing that stinkin' final exam, continue grading the stack of projects, or take a nap. Guess which one I chose? Seeing as how I am sitting in front of my computer with a stack of projects and a blank Word document open on my computer, you can probably guess which choice I made. Silly me. BUT...you should be a little bit proud of me, because I resisted stopping for a "cup of joe" on the way home from working out this evening - and instead BREWED MY OWN coffee at home! See, I am learning. For those of you going back to the beginning to see what time it is...yes, it is now 8:32pm and I am having a LARGE cup of my favorite caffinated beverage. Those projects will not grade themselves, unfortunately. Bummer. :) Now, I took some pictures, because blog posts are oh so much more exciting with a few photos to critique. And I will post those pictures, but I am not promising that they are GOOD pictures, okay? Because, I am not a photographer. At all. As much as I wish that were one of my talents, it is NOT (as you can tell). But I wanted to give you a quick peek into my little world right now - so enjoy the pics, and please....don't be a procrastinator like me. Thanks for CHOOSING to read my blog. I love ya! (PS: I seriously tried to space out the post into nice paragraphs, but it won't let me...sorry if it is kind of hard to read!)